5!

Dear Ryan,
Well, Merry Christmas! I haven`t seen you in quite some time, &...well...I miss you a bit. A lot, actually, &i don`t really know why i`ve never told you that. I mean, Christmas was all right, fine, i guess. But who said you were allowed to grow up so quickly? Who says you have your own life & were lucky enough to meet a girl as sweet &kind as she? Oh, laughing man, what have you won? I`m missing out on important parts of your life. &it seems that neither of us care enough to pick up the two tin cans &have an honest-to-goodness conversation that dusts the cobwebs collecting in the corners of our rooms. [for years now!]
All i`m trying to say is i`m sorry. &i miss you. &i love you.
See you one day, Lion-heart.
Your sister,
Arianna

IV.

Let all mortal flesh keep silence, &with fear &trembling stand; ponder nothing earthly minded, for with blessing in His hand, Christ our God to earth descendeth, our full homage to demand.
King of kings, yet born of Mary, as of old on earth He stood, Lord of lords, in human vesture, in the body &the blood; He will give to all the faithful His own self for heavenly food.
Rank on rank the host of heaven spreads its vanguard on the way, as the Light of light descendeth from the realms of endless day, that the powers of hell may vanish as the darkness clears away.
At His feet the six wingèd seraph, cherubim with sleepless eye, veil their faces to His presence, as with ceaseless voice they cry:
Hallelujah, Hallelujah; Hallelujah, Lord Most High!

long night

tossing &turning,
unable to rest soundly,
peacefully frustrated and furiously I
check the clock
teasing me:
there are only four [three!] hours till light.
"Good night, socks."

to where have You wandered, little lamb?
let me gather You up in my arms
&carry You safely to the fold
of sweet dreams,
well-rested sleeps,
&little hearts proudly beating.

part 3.

with sudsy fingers scrubbing the scalp of a grimy eleven-year old,
she sits back on her heels, with beating heart &thinks:
"yes, yes, i am a live."

part 2.

to be unselfish &kind with hope &bright words,
&to plant flowers side by side in zig-zaggy rows.

yes, this is living.

a messy, full life: part 1.

January, 1979. [May, 1987.]
Saw a terrible crash and I couldn`t help but laugh,
As my ear pressed against the past like a glass on a wall of a house in a photograph.
My forehead no longer sweet with holy kisses worthy of Your fiery lips.
I was floating in a peaceful sea "rescued" by a sinking ship.

If I could become the servant of all, no lower place to fall. [If could be your servant]
If I could become the servant of all, no lower place to fall. [If I could be your servant]
If I could become the servant of all, no lower place to fall. [If could be your servant]
If I could become the servant of all, no lower place to fall. [If I could be your servant]

You watch me like a ten car highway wreck with detached, vulgar curiosity.
This looking down at the tops of the hats of us passers-by from your seventh floor balcony.
From such a height you missed creatures too small for sight carry on covert conversations.
And the misguided insects crown me their grasshopper king with a dance of celebration.

After years with a crown on my head, I`ve grown overfed, unconcerned, &comfortably numb.
Kept busy indulging in the pleasures of the wealthy.
[Someone make me afraid of what I`ve become!]
At the first sign of possible sorrow, I turned my heels &ran.
[Oh, I`ll never learn.]
My life is a cup of sugar I`ve borrowed before time began &forgot to return.

It was a matter of time--I always said I could see so now I`m going blind. [I could be your servant]
It was a matter of time--I always said I could see so now I`m going blind. [If I could be your servant]
It was a matter of time--I always said I could see so now I`m going blind. [I could be your servant]
It was a matter of miserable time-- but I heard somewhere there was a cure for useless eyes? [If I could be your servant]

what child is this, sir?

"The wolf shall live with the lamb, the leopard shall lie down with the kid, the calf &the lion &the fatling together, &a little child shall lead them." -Isaiah 11:6

&with waters welling up

reaching out with one cooling hand, he wiped the fever from my brow.
&spoke in silence joyous sounds
that should either be suffocated
or screamed out loud.