Sunday, September 30, 2007

kindness

I went to the zoo today. I found myself wanting to push small, bilingual children on swings, &spectate an afternoon-long soccer game. I found myself soaking strips of paper in paste, &expertly layering them over chicken wire. I found myself enjoying an opossum: for the first time in however long I have been alive. They only live up to four years, you know.
Tonight is good for being quiet, &studying stewardly, &living hopefully.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

I find that tenderness often goes underestimated.

I am not the wisest of children, &I expect You to come in rushing wind, &loud sounds, and fantastic displays of light &noise &magnitude. I do not find it half so believeable when You come to me through other women, &sweet words, and flowers, and fellowship, & "you`re too tender"s, & not behaving as I ought. I say that I want closeness with the Lord, but search me and know that I am often found lying quietly in the evening, waiting for the lightning, when He is already gently raining love &trust over me.
&that`s all I got. In a feeble attempt to mimick Buchner, I stretched my hands out, &whispered "Please, Lord," over &over. And do you know what He told me? He told me that He loved me, &He told me to trust Him.
That`s all.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

back through the park.

"It`s hard to say the right words without practice, I said & she whispered in my ear, Say them as many times as you like & we practiced late into the night."

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

I like the weather today.

I like that I can walk across the lawn, &wave to the groundskeeper, even though I don`t really know him.
I like that I remembered that it was Wednesday, &made a waffle for breakfast, because that is what I say I do.
I like that Diana is starting a grass roots movement based on love.
I like that Geoffrey is reading these days, &that our exchange was almost cordial, if not friendly.
For I have missed that.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

!

"I`m going to start setting realistic goals for myself. I`m going to skateboard every day for as long as the weather allows. I`m going to practice picking locks more regularly. I`m going to improve my French. I'm going to improve my Arabic. I`m going to learn to fight. I`m going to live in a decommissioned submarine with my friends. Good morning, Jeff. Ping. Are we out of toast? Ping. We`ll have to send someone into town. Ping. I`m going to start going out at night, dressed all in black, with my hood up. I`m going to stand in the shadows where a lot of people walk past. I`m going to encrypt my hard drive for fun. I`m going to encrypt the words, "You do good work" and I`m going to send it to every intelligence agency I can think of. "

movement &timing

Today stood on her own.
I simply walked along beside.

Sunday, September 9, 2007

as bold as lions.

Wisdom wears care full shawls, &walks slowly, &speaks softly, even between eight and eleven.
&knows that it is good to hear words, and recognise whose voice it belongs to.
even when you are ambiguous.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

september 3,2006.


Technically, mules (a cross between a donkey and horse) are unable to reproduce.
Technically, it appears I like to put limits on what You can do.
I hope to change that.