Thursday, January 31, 2008

93108

I hear a train moaning in the distance, &I woke up this morning in a sweat, peeled off my soaking tee, &lay quietly under covers too heavy for this weather. "Must`ve sweated out that fever," I thought to myself.
I don`t get sick often. Or at least I don`t admit it when I am.
But today. Today, I am sick. I am easily whelmed over &take every comment personally. I curl up inside of myself and listen to Bon Iver`s For Emma, For Ever Ago. I pretend that I am grown up &will live in an apartment somewhere, and maybe work two jobs, &share meals with a roommate or two. I think that college doesn`t prepare me for what`s next as well as they say it does. I`m finding the beginning of wisdom starts by loving others. I don`t know if it`s worth it quite yet. I`d like to think so. I really would.
"I`m not a fan of danger," she says.
There will be more than just falling a sleep this time.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hope you're feeling better today. I wish someone could put a cool wash cloth on your forehead for you and remind you that you don't have to have it all figured out. I am 23 and 1/2 years out of college and I think maybe I am almost prepared for what's next. But maybe not.

I think college is about making friends for the journey.

pearl said...

I think life is about making friends for the journey.

And you are one such, very liked.

pearl said...

your letter came today, in a bag from the office of the post, apologizing for damage i couldn't find. alas. a conversation (via skype?) would be nectar, indeed.